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Showing posts from February, 2010

Before I spontaneously combust...

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As I might have mentioned once or twice before, I am going take a some time off blogging starting tomorrow. I need to break out of the post-a-day routine to prove that I am NOT addicted (and prove that blogging is not the thing preventing my spontaneous combustion - ha - preposterous idea!). I might take a few weeks off, I might blog on Tuesday....who knows....I'll just have to wait and see. So then I wondered what I would leave you with before I go on virtual leave to risk spontaneous combustion. Then my head did it's usual, whizz, whirr, tick tick, fuzz, whallop and said, 'Fact File'. I thought I would 'tag' myself in a slightly self-obsessed way. The file will have to be a slightly unusual one though because there's not much I haven't given away already. ODD SNIPPET FACT FILE ON MOLLY POTTER Worst journeys: •The 40 hour train ride from Vienna to Athens wasn't great but the people we met made it 'interesting' - especially the Austrian knife

Thought prompted by my Self Esteem dossier!

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Last weekend, I was having a bit of a muck out. This is prompted when I either cannot a) find something or b) move. It's quite ugly to watch. The equation is: slight irritation about lost thing + bullish person + extreme chaos in physical surroundings = irritation, even more bullish person, unsettled dust and nothing achieved. (I appreciate this isn't mathematically sound but I wouldn't risk pointing it out if I were you; I'm still in chaos). I was trying to find the visitors' book that we had in our toilet for many years to share some of the wonderful comments people had written, but failed. Instead I found what I used to call, 'my self esteem dossier'. It is full of newspaper clippings of stuff I have done, special cards people have made for me and various other 'feel good' bits and pieces from a variety of places. A look through is guaranteed to make me glow from deep inside. As a teacher, I used to invest a lot in developing and preserving pupils

Everything comes to life!

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When our kids were younger and we were all bundled in bed together, they always wanted us to bring cuddly toys to life or turn our hands into characters. I suspect parents everywhere do this regularly. We still do this with our youngest. Last night's hand-demonstrated story, for example, was about Harriet the Hippo with the itchy bottom (she searched all over for the perfect scratch) and we have a fat penguin cuddly toy that is trying to learn English but can only really say, heavily accented, 'my nose is like a carrot.' In fact, I don't think there is a cuddly toy without a persona and my hand has played endless roles (no seedy ones). It thinks it is an actor. The other day, I stumbled across this 'story' that included many of the characters chap and I turned our hands into. The characters became quite developed such that I must have written this down based on them. (I didn't remember writing it!) Our daughter used to nag us endlessly to tun our hands into

Equal Opps

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A bit serious again...oops...sorry. Will lighten up tomorrow! In the development of social ideals, there was a time when some people went round saying we were all the same. Woman were the same as men, black people the same as white, disabled people were as capable as able bodied people etc in an attempt to combat prejudice. Those 'same' statements were making a point, at that stage of social consciousness development, that needed to be made. In other words, 'don't assume we can't do something or make assumptions about us because of who we are'. However, it was soon realised that this was not an overly effective approach in the aim for fairness and thankfully things have moved on. It has been realised that simply treating everyone the same does not acknowledge institutionalised disadvantage and the barriers a person might come up against as a result of belonging to a particular group or minority. In other words, efforts have to be made to ensure that everyone can

The normative approach...bear with me, it is quite interesting!

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Educators, health professionals, the media and parents/carers tend to focus on the most extreme risk taking behaviours in young people (e.g. early sex, binge drinking etc). This can give us an exaggerated view of young people’s behaviour and make us forget that the vast majority are behaving ‘sensibly’. Furthermore it doesn’t just give ‘us’ that impression, young people also receive distorted impressions about their peers' behaviour. The normative effect is something I learnt about at a conference a few years ago and despite its proven beneficial influence in health promotion and reducing risky behaviours (it's been heavily researched), its 'use' has not filtered through universally. It’s another counter-intuitive thing (like giving kids sexual aspirations!) that once explained – makes perfect sense. Here goes…… The normative approach is a model based on the idea that we are influenced so much by our peers – especially when we are teenagers (when we are often at our mos

Get a badge!

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I didn't mean this to be a long post. I got carried away (see enthusiasm badge). This is me messing around (forte) with one of the more silly creative thinking ideas from my book Outside the Box (9-11). In the book, I ask kids to make up what a person would have to do to achieve a set of silly badges (much like buy scout/girl guide badges). Here are a couple of examples that I give.... ******************************* Great irritator’s badge 1) Irritate three different people in the same day and ask them to sign a piece of paper that will prove you irritated them. 2) Make up an irritation questionnaire that explores what irritates people. 3) Make up three really irritating sounds and irritate at least three different people with them. 4) Keep an irritation diary for one week and list all the things you have seen that have irritated people. You must list at least eight things. 5) Tell the badge collector what you think is the most irritating thing in the world and why you think it is

The power of listening

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I once was engaged in an activity on a training day where everyone was asked to think of a little life problem that needed to be solved. Nothing major, just something like what to buy so and so for their birthday present or a little inconvenience that we needed to sort. We than found a partner and sat directly opposite them. We took it in turns to have five minutes opposite our partner just talking about the 'problem' while she or he sat facing us actively listening. By actively listening, we meant giving good eye contact, nodding and saying things like 'yes' and 'go on'. When we were asked to give feedback. Nearly everyone had solved their problem. The reason? If there is a problem, the person with it has most authority over it. They have all the insider knowledge, are the most tuned into the problem and are the person that can work out the most-likely-to-work and palatable solution for their unique circumstances. So unless the problem needs the input of specia

Storms in tea cups

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I remember reading an article about happiness some time ago. It identified many criteria that those with a generally happy disposition tended to have. There were not many surprises. It stated, for example, that severe poverty can have a negative impact on happiness but once all basic needs are met, there is no correlation between increased wealth and an increase in happiness (although many strive for wealth, I assume, with the idea it will make them happier which is not surprising considering the conditioning we receive in the capitalist western world!). It spoke about 'flow', personal 'wiring' and health and so on. However, the one happiness criteria that stood out for me was, 'the ability to transcend pettiness.' It is remarkable how we can sometimes let something that is, in the large scheme of things, quite insignificant, annoy or upset us to the point of it being detrimental to our happiness and wellbeing. Which brings me to one of my more serious catchphra

The fun I have in People Playgrounds

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I went to a local real ale pub this Friday and had a fantastic time. I drank a fine real ale and my outlook became a tad chemically altered. It's taken me years to work out why I like drinking alcohol. It's definitely a social thing for me. Up until recently I would very rarely drink at home (it's still not very common). What I love is the way it makes people more likely to 'connect' with others. In a pub like the one I went to on Friday, everyone becomes friendly and most people are happy to talk with anyone. So to me, the pub becomes one big 'people playground' that I can usually quite freely explore. I suspect there are some places in the world where this would be possible without alcohol. Originally, I met with friends. They like to arrive and leave early. Thing is, they always leave just as I am about to get going (I usually arrive some time after them and my alcoholic stamina is pretty good). So I bump into people - people I know, those I vaguely know

What I've learnt from a winter season in Blogsville

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I have found travelling in Blogsville a very entertaining, interesting, thought provoking, self-awareness raising and enlightening experience. This is not just because of what I have read on other people’s blogs or formulated for my own; it’s also the learning I’ve gained by reflecting on writing my posts, the comments they receive and from commenting on other people’s blogs. An outline of my key learning….! 1) Writing style I appear to be able to write in a reasonably clear way, using simple language to convey my meaning. Not bad for someone that could not read at ten and carried a fear toward the written word for years!! I also realise I am the queen (or prevalent implementer) of bracketed tangents and elaborations!!! 2) Blogging community It’s surprising how you feel connected to your main commenters! It’s a little blogging community. We are all so different and each blogger also brings their uniquely flavoured comments. For example: Claire - flippant, irreverent and very funny Nick

Pet hates

I found this activity in a book that tickled me!!! I was impressed with the list that had been composed. Quite often lists in resources are not as comprehensive as this one! The activity is used to investigate our own viewpoints, prejudices, judgements and intolerances. I'm pretty sure we all have them. I defy anyone not to find a single pet hate on this list! You don't have to share if you don't want! You could just say how many you counted so as to prevent offence! 1) Urban 4X4 drivers 2) Men in white socks 3) Balding men with comb overs 4) Limp handshakes 5) Rottweiler owners 6) Brits abroad 7) Tattoos 8) Fur coats 9) Welsh 10) Dirty fingernails 11) Gnome owners 12) NIMBYs (Not in my back yard) 13) English 14) Socks and Sandals 15) Fluffy dice in cars 16) Hippies 17) American tourists 18) Gum chewers 19) Smokers 20) Irish 21) 'Chavs' 22) White stilettos 23) Sun readers 24) Binge drinkers 25) Scots 26) Men who wear jewellery 27) Flat cap wearers 28) Shell suits 29

My poor mother

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When I was a child my mum used to tear her hair out with worry about the possibility of me being malnourished. (There's certainly no sign of that now). You see there was loads I simply refused to eat. My most severe repulsion was towards brown, chewy lumps of meat - something my mum seemed to cook every other day. Being the 70s and having parents with war rationing deep in their psyche meant a) it was considered good fortunes to have brown chewy lumps of meat (in the large scheme of things I can see that) and b) everything definitely had to be eaten. My mother's way of dealing with my refusal to eat was to leave me sitting at the table for hours insisting I could not get down from the table until I had cleared my plate. I would remain at said table chewing the same morsel for what felt like hours. I could usually hear other kids playing out in my street and that would twist the knife a little further. I could, in fact, chew a single piece of meat until it no longer had any flav

Reflective learning - discussions, debates and arguments

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Eeee. I do go away and reflect.

A normal distribution

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Hey I am going to unashamedly nerd-out today!!!! Especially as my sister has gone on holiday. When I did A level Maths, half of it was statistics. I didn't much like it but I found it easy. (Have I mentioned I got an A??!!?? - not bad for someone who could barely read. I am proud that I was once clever in a way people wouldn't suspect to look to me.) However, there was one concept from stats that really stuck with me: the normal distribution. To me, it is a beautiful and simple concept and I am a concept freak! I am sure lots of you will have encountered a normal distribution (and some of you reacted badly to it that is if you haven't obliterated it from your grey matter) but it basically shows the distribution of any continuous (not discrete) data such as intelligence, height, foot length, etc in our species. So what it means is you get a greater number of people with or close to the mean average of anything. So if the average height for women was 5 ft 4, then most people

I can still cringe!

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I have given three wedding speeches in the past and some have been more successful than others. My first wedding speech was certainly a little sloppy?....well you judge for yourself. My sister and I had just spent a truly amazing week in Istanbul. Rest and healthy living were certainly not on the agenda and we were returning to the UK desperately in need of vitamin C and sleep. My friend's wedding was in the afternoon following the morning flight home. The speech I was to deliver had not been considered at all during my time in Turkey and on the plane, I decided to write a poem about the fantastic couple Jack and Jackie (last name: Frost - no kidding). I can remember the first two lines: When Jackie first showed me Jack I thought she was joking This provoked a ripple of laughter but other than that, the rest of the 'poem' was overshadowed by just four words. On the plane my sister had suggested the line, 'Jackie has got elephantitus' and I had written it down. It ma

The Outer Hebrides

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I have never been to the Outer Hebrides but somehow have still managed to feel a (very) mild affiliation to them on account of the following. When I was about eleven our dad returned from work one day with the weighty speculation that we might move to Benbecular so that my dad could run the airport there. Apparently the airport traffic amounted to about one aeroplane a day. The move was carefully and seriously considered over the following few weeks. I remember feeling extremely unsettled by this idea and the more I learned about the Outer Hebrides, the more resistance I felt. Aside from being told most island children go to boarding schools on mainland Scotland for their education and that its young residents usually do very well academically because there's nothing to do but study (this really scared me) my main fear was centred around the fact that devout religion on the islands meant people were not allowed to actually do anything on the day of rest: Sundays. I can hear my ele

The subconscious, unconscious or shadow...

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I love the work of Carl Jung. O.K. there are places where he becomes a little abstract and consequently different descriptions of his work seem not entirely to be in agreement with each other (particularly around archetypes and complexes) but there's some great and simple learning to be had in his basic description of the Self. Unlike Freud, who was completely sex obsessed and linked every single human complex or motivation to sex, Jung saw a bigger picture.  The part that I find particularly fascinating, is his teachings about the unconscious. Those that continue to keep their conscious and unconscious separate for the duration of their lives describe feeling flat and listless and feel a sense of dissatisfaction. This is because they, in effect, remain significantly less than the full person that they really are. To 'receive' Jung's teachings does take a mindset in the first place that I suspect many won't want/have - which is fine - we are all on our own journe

My Valentine.....

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This post won't be for those of you delicate of stomach. As blogging seems to have become my medium recently - how could I not use it to be gooey about my Andy Chap. A small sample of the things I love about my Andy Chap......... 1) He's my life support system. Before Andy came along a tomato and a few prawns regularly sustained me. Now I eat real, beautifully cooked food. He's a great nurse too - medical and psychiatric. 2) He's my 'put things in perspective' rock. He has a magical, to the point, way of summing things up and filtering out the stuff that doesn't matter. 3) His sense of humour. He giggles a lot. Sometimes with me, sometimes at me, sometimes at himself, sometimes with himself, often at things few would find funny and many other times. And when he giggles, I have to giggle too. 4) His hat wearing. It's something to behold. 5) His wearing of female attire is even better. He'd have made a good woman.